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Monday 11 November 2013

Ah, paperwork...


Every day at the temp job requires a plethora of paperwork –


  1. Type all the crap from one piece of paper into a computer program.
  2. Click on button that sends info to an official person in another office.
  3. Print out all the crap you’ve typed in then staple it to the original bit of paper that you took the info from. Why? I dunno.
  4. ‘Get email back from official person indicating you did not scan the original bit of paper.
  5. Scan paper.
  6. Get another email. You did not tick the box on screen that indicates work all completed. We have rejected your submission.
  7. Tick box. Swear under breath. Re-send info to anal twit…I mean colleague
  8. Get another email advising the date stamped on the scan is wrong. All info rejected.
  9. Play with mobile phone for five minutes while muttering.
  10. Stamp the proper date five times and re-scan.
  11. Smile when an email comes back rejecting the scan with the five stamps as it’s ‘not policy’. One stamp must be in the left hand corner only.
  12. Liquid paper out four stamps and paint two fingernails with the white liquid paper.
  13. Email to say scan sent all the time knowing it hasn’t been because you are following a theory that they really don’t want the scan. It’s job justification for them.
  14. Email back advising they have no scan.
  15. You email back ‘Please see attached’ knowing there’s nothing attached.    
  16. They email ‘attachment approved. Please file all paperwork.’
  17. Look at bin. Contemplate options. 

2 comments:

mike burns said...

Brilliant writing. So true. When will you collate all of this into a book? Hmmmmm?

Unknown said...

Hmmm...I thought I was the only smart arse allowed on here.