Auditioning gyms...

I’ve been interviewing local gyms to work out which one I will go to and sweat at. Since leaving Brizzie I have been gym-less. I’m very picky when it comes to gyms. I want value for money and the slickest salesperson on the planet often gives up after trying to sell me something. Why? Because I understand fluent bullshit, I know they will try and sell me useless add-ons and basically I can’t be charmed. It’s genetically impossible. I am, what a salesmen would call, a pain in the arse to deal with.

I went in to one of the local gyms very near to where I live. I was greeted by a blonde stick insect who was so overly enthusiastic that I found her exhausting. Seriously, people like this should come with a warning tag and an on-off button. Anyway, we walked around the gym and she asked what was I there for? What were my goals? I try to avoid goals. They’re fatiguing/boring for the jaded. But I said to Skinny Minnie - well, unless every fattening thing suddenly becomes good for you then I’m here for fitness and weight loss. She nodded and said ‘I know weight loss is so hard.’ Uh huh…sure you do you…not…lying stick figure.

So we sat down and talked money. Nah, I wasn’t going to join that gym. I just like to haggle and it gives me an idea what other gyms are offering. I interview gym number 2 tomorrow. It’s a 24hr gym. Please shoot me if I’m ever running on a treadmill at 2am in the morning.

Amarinda Jones
Penn Halligan
www.amarindajones.com
www.amarindajones.blogspot.com
Be daring...read an Amarinda book