Where art thou rat?

I have something dead under the house. I can smell it. Contrary to popular belief it’s not the place I hide the bodies of those who have pissed me off. They are in another location. I think it‘s a rat – the four legged kind. I saw something scuttling quickly away one arvo and I thought bugger. Why bugger? Well, I have to kill it and then dispose of it. Ick. This is when you need a man. I am an incredibly independent woman who recognizes men are very good with rats. In fact, men are extremely useful for all distasteful chores. Anyway, I dumped Rat killer and now the smell under the house alerts me to the fact the rat has carked it (died). But where? I cannot find the body. Most annoying. The little bastard has obviously thought with its last dying break “I’ll fix her.” I am thinking of calling in Horatio Caine to find the rat. In the interim I have dumped Naphthalene flakes everywhere to drown out the smell. Yes, very proactive - make another problem over the existing problem.

I bought some vitamins today and they had cotton wool stuffed in the top as most pills do in Oz. I hate cotton wool. I cannot touch it – it gives me the irrits. It’s like touching fibreglass fibres to me. Urrrgggh…why do manufacturers persist on stuffing it in medicine bottles? What’s that about?

I got a contract from Ellora’s Cave for my latest manuscript - Penned Again. I’m happy with that. It’s about a demon that takes on a bet he cannot get his mortal wife back – yes, true life stuff.

I don’t take a list with me when I go shopping as I believe I have such a superior mind that I will instantly know what I need. This is the third week I have come home with another container of butter, I now have 8 tubs of Cheesecake flavoured yoghurt in the fridge and you can never have too much toothpaste. Yes – that’s me – the woman with the superior mind.

Across the street from the new job is a St Vinnie’s store. I don’t know it you have them where you are but they are an op shop – second hand shop -and the proceeds go back to charity. I am on op shop girl from my childhood. As a kid it did not occur to me, until nasty arsed Julie Mason pointed out, that everyone else did not wear second hand clothes like I did. So, I have history with all things second hand. Although I do buy new clothes, I still take a squiz in the op shops as you never know what you will find. Oxfam in London used to have the best once-worn, perfect condition satin shoes. Debutante’s would wear them once then chuck ‘em. I had, along with waitress friend Teresa, the best collection of satin shoes. Where do you wear satin shoes in London? Anywhere you bloody want. I had a penchant for wearing them with socks. I was a tad strange back then. Now I’m merely weird. Anyway the op shop across the road had brand new clothes being sold for $2. Bargain. Back to my roots once more.

Speaking of all things rooted…I saw this horrible woman I used to work with at Promptel as I turned the corner yesterday. I was tempted to run her down as she had been such a hag to so many people, not me of course because I don’t allow that. I refrained from giving into instinct though when I saw how much weight she had put on. I love Karma.

I’ll have the winner of the random contest on my blog tomorrow. If you think what is Amarinda talking about? Scroll back to Tuesday’s blog entry about Barbie. I have had a lot of emailed responses. There is still time to enter to win the first copy of Shades of Gray – released 6th Feb through Ellora’s Cave.


Eternity contest

What could you spend an eternity doing? What is your passion? Your hunger? Your deepest desire? Each day beginning February 5 and running through February 14 one of the ten authors will complete the line, "My darling I could spend eternity…" on either their blog or website. Collect all ten answers and e-mail them to anny@annycook.com with Eternally Yours in the subject line to win some hot, romantic books. There will be three lucky Valentine winners.

The prizes.........


1st prize--5 books

2nd prize--3 books

3rd prize--2 books

The books

Sandra Cox Silverhills
Mona Risk To Love a Hero
Brynn Paulin Tribute For the Goddess
Bronwyn Green Mystic Circle
Cindy Spencer Pape Stone and Earth
N.J. Walters Seduction of Shamus O’Rourke
Elyssa Edwards Mating Stone
Amarinda Jones Shades of Gray
Kelly Kirch Time for Love
Anny Cook Honeysuckle

Entries must be in by February 16 at midnight EST. All books and prize winners will be drawn randomly.

Kelly has the blog saga on www.kkirch.blogspot.com and Anny is being all existential on www.annycook.blogspot.com.

www.freewebs.com/amarindajones/
Go ahead: Live with abandon. Be outrageous at any age. What are you saving your best self for?

Phone a friend(s)......

I did something I wanted to do for ages today. I rang my two blog mates – authors Anny Cook and Kelly Kirch. For those of you who don’t know, I live in Australia and the dynamic duo live in the US. We have never met yet it seemed like we had picked up a conversation from a moment ago. There is this weird connection between us. We are three wildly different women from different walks of life and ideas. Yet it works between us. I really enjoyed talking to them both. Kelly said I was ‘much more upbeat and cheerful’ then she expected. And she expected my voice to be ‘deeper and smoky sounding with a hard sarcastic edge.’ I promised Kelly I would work on being morose and husky sounding for our future interaction. It’s the least I can do for a friend. As for Anny – she is the Zen Queen – cheerful, warm and wise. I could talk to them both for hours.

Okay – enough soppy stuff. Horatio Caine. Why the sudden change of topic? Because I can….hmmm…good name for a book. Anyway, I digress…I have an old VCR player. It’s probably ten years old and still works so I don’t bother getting a DVD player as why chuck something out that is working for something new? I don’t watch much television – mainly news and a few shows. I don’t even have pay TV (cable) as I would not watch it. Anyway, last night, I decided I would not write on my current WIP. I would instead watch some of the dozen tapes I had recorded. See? This is where Horatio Caine comes in. For anyone that does not know he is the stoic, stony faced detective on CSI:Miami. He fascinates me. It‘s because he is so complicated, as is Gil Grissom on the original CSI

and the King of complicated – Jack Bauer on 24. I like complicated people –and it’s not just television characters. I like people who mumble something deep and cryptic as they stare coolly off into the sunset. I love people with a mysterious edge that makes you want to try and find out more. I hate actual puzzles – jig and crosswords – as I do not have the patience. But enigmatic people fascinate me. So do you like complicated people or do you wish they would stop being so bloody mysterious and moody?

Hint – never use faked tanning lotion if you are going to do a half arsed job of it. I rush everything. That’s who I am. I expect I’ll slow down when I am dead. But for now I do everything quickly and most times it’s a blessing. But there are times when you have to ‘evenly spread lotion on both legs’ and that rushing is a bad thing. So I have multi-tonal legs at the moment. The bright side is they make me laugh when I look at them. Moral of the story – pay attention and slow down. The reality? It ain’t going to happen.


So what exciting things are y’all (I am practising my American courtesy of Anny Cook) doing on this pleasant Saturday? I know that you can find profound words of wisdom on www.annycook.blogspot.com. Anny also has the blog serial today. I would like to say it’s profound but I am trying to cut down on my lies. Kelly is supposed to be finishing up her week of penance for the HAI. What is that? She cut the map of Australia in half on her blog www.kkirch.blogspot.com. Today I have requested she explain the ‘great Aussie salute’ and ‘Louie the Fly.’ It’s a co-related topic

And now a sedate excerpt from The Goddess and the Ghost. I am trying to be good-ish. The book is released…er…I can never remember the date but it’s either the 26 or 27th November from Total-E-Bound…. http://www.total-e-bound.com/product.asp?s=v7Yg5661446&strParents=&CAT_ID=&P_ID=183

"I am in hell,” Zipporah Scott muttered gravely as she surveyed her surroundings with a growing sense of horror. Something was not right. The air smelt different. The people around her looked odd. The ground under her feet felt rough and unforgiving. A sudden spurt of panic surged through Zipporah’s veins. Oh dear lord I must be strong. She closed her eyes, praying that the scene before her tormented gaze was only a hallucination. Maybe those two aspirins she had taken earlier in the day had affected her mind in some way or maybe the three cups of extra strong black coffee she had imbibed had been a bad thing. She opened her eyes slowly.

“Oh fuck,” she muttered as she looked around at the grass and trees and all things natural and earthy. This was the reality of her situation for the next two whole days. And as realities went, this current one sucked badly. “I will survive this,” she muttered through gritted teeth, her fists clenched with determination. If Scarlett could get through the burning of Atlanta she could get through this. Goddesses could get through anything if they had to.
“Isn’t this great, Auntie Zipp?” Evie Daniels, her ten-year-old niece, chirped. She jumped around excitedly, seemingly oblivious to the horrors around her.
“It’s swell, kid.” Zipporah was trying not to sound cynical and jaded but she knew she was failing miserably. She looked at her fair-haired niece with an affection mixed with pity and shock. Zipporah shook her head sadly. Poor deluded child. Who knew that someone with the same strain of blood running through their veins could be excited by the predicament they were now in? Zipporah knew that Evie was young and had not been exposed to the evils of the world. She could not be fully aware of the horrors they were going to have to endure. The angst, the drama and the sheer terror. Zipporah felt a shiver of fear race down her spine when she though about what was before her. Could she do it? Was she strong enough? Could she face her demons?
“I hate fucking camping.” If the great outdoors was so good why was it outdoors and why did everyone have entertainment lounges and computers indoors? And if they were meant to live outside then why had human beings ever been allowed to evolve to the point of designing free form architecture? Zipporah did not believe for one second that cave dwellers, if given the choice, would prefer to live outside battling the elements. It was just wrong. It was too much to inflict on the uninitiated, the cynical and the city bred.
“You just swore, Auntie Zipp.” Evie looked at her with childlike amusement as if at the thought of an adult being caught out doing something wrong.
Bugger. A Good Aunt did not swear around the K-I-D.
“I did not…much.” Zipporah blew the fringe out of her eyes. “Don’t tell your mother or she’ll think I’m a terrible influence.” Her sister already knew she was a terrible influence as all teasing siblings did. She had given the single Zipporah specific instructions to follow this weekend. Zipporah could not recall ‘no swearing’ being one of them. However she was certain it rated up there with her niece going to bed by nine o’clock and not eating junk food. The latter rule they had already broken. The former, Zipporah was determined to stick to but she was flexible in her approach to Aunt-dom.

www.freewebs.com/amarindajones/
Go ahead: Live with abandon. Be outrageous at any age. What are you saving your best self for?