Shooting dicks off....

So, I watched a bit of The Bold and The Beautiful today. I haven’t watched it in ages and from what I can work out pretty much everything is the same as it was when I last saw it maybe a year ago but for the fact that one of the characters was committed to being a virgin until she married. I know. Fancy that. Anyway, I expect that will soon change and I’m guessing the virgin’s suddenly ex-fiancé who gave her engagement ring to her trashy, arch nemesis, because she slept with him and the virgin didn’t and that apparently gets you a whopping great diamond ring, will contemplate the possibilities of having sex – but – I reckon the father of the bloke who threw the virgin over due to the need to penetrate and who also slept with the trashy arch nemesis, I expect will soon sleep with the pure at heart virgin because first up the father can and probably to show her and everyone else what a real man can do. I also expect he will fall in love with the virginal one who will spurn him because she finds out his evil plan to de-virginate her – possibly a made up word – and then she will get drunk and maybe shoot him in the dick but everyone will forgive her because she’s a virgin…or was…or you know…it’s complicated yet obvious.

Anyway this brings me to another point that a friend and I had a long online discussion about today and that is does being physically/facially beautiful make life more easy for you? We came to the conclusion that it does. Why? Because you have to use what weapons you have to get what you what. Yes, yes, very manipulative but there it is. What does that have to do with drunken, dick shooting off spurned virgins? Not a lot other than if you're a man you should probably watch out for virgins with guns.

Bloody hell…

…the head cold from hell is back. How much can a koala bear I ask you? Anyway, I hauled myself to the supermarket to buy cough syrup. Have you ever read the instructions on some of those bottles and packets of cold and flu stuff? “This ‘may’ help.” Or “The ‘possible’ relief of symptoms.” May? Possible? I demand deadly chemicals to surge through my body searching and destroying disease and possibly scarring my insides for life as they ravage even the slightest indication of illness. Is that too much to ask? As I was reading labels, this mother with a trail of kids wandered past and the mother said to one of them “I am not taking you to the toilet no matter how much you beg, Paris.” Well, first up – who the hell seriously names a kid Paris unless they want them to grow up useless – and second – if the kid needs to go to the loo take her. I for one do not need a sprog (child) peeing in the aisles of the supermarket.

And now I am home, several swigs of heavy duty kill-all-germs cough syrup later and the Bold and the Beautiful is on in the background on TV and Katie Logan is saying to whoever her husband is “I can’t live without you.” Has the world gone mad? Kids called Paris? Possible maybes? Of course she can bloody live without whoever he is and let’s hope Paris made it to the loo.

Amarinda Jones
Penn Halligan
www.amarindajones.com
www.amarindajones.blogspot.com
Be daring...read an Amarinda book

Text me baby one more time…

I had the Bold and the Beautiful on TV – it comes on before the news – and Brooke and Ridge were all angst ridden and emotional – as always – they were breaking up - again - and he was marrying several times removed ex-wife Taylor…why? I don’t know but it was about time for him to marry someone else and then dump her and go back to Brooke – actually when you think about it – it’s almost the perfect romantic relationship because Brooke and Ridge always know they’ll be together…at some stage…eventually…anyway, so they were all tense and dramatic sending each other overwrought, desperately romantic messages via cell phone text messaging and I thought why don’t you just go and see each other and get all this angst ridden crap over and done with. Yes, yes, I know it’s a soap opera and I know its all about tension but honestly…if you had a friend who was carrying on like this wouldn’t you tell her to pull her head in? Text messages do not make for a meaningful relationship.

Correct. I don’t care for text messages. Ring me. Talk to me with actual words and sound. And yeah, I have gone through that manic rush of hot, wild words of lust tapped out in a text message. They’re exciting at the time but once you see through the haze of lust, you know they’re not real. It’s a game isn’t it? Flirt - seduce – submit - and I believe if someone cannot say something to your face, so you can see their eyes, then to me the messages are not genuine. They’re fantasy and while fantasy is fun it’s not dependable or truthful or real. Just like Bold, there’s always an under story you don’t get in a text message.

Even in a romance book, with all the romantic fantasy, readers aren’t going to accept the hero communicating to the heroine through cute, short words on a screen. As a reader I’d be thinking – why the hell doesn’t her talk to her? What does he have to hide? What can’t he say to her face? What is he worried about giving away?

Isn’t it sad in this day and age that we rely on hastily, banged out phonetic variations of words sent from your phone to mine to express how we feel? Where’s the romance in that?

Text me baby one more time? Hmm…doesn’t have a ring to it does it?

www.amarindajones.com
www.amarindajones.blogspot.com
Be daring...read an Amarinda book