The brains trust...

At work there is a group of people that is considered the brains trust. They do deep, analytical stuff that I’m sure is probably going to be of some huge scientific merit that will change mankind but can they find a new container of coffee? No.

I get a call at my desk. There is no coffee. Yes there is. I’m the office manager. I mange everything from toilet paper to the D-Day landings to expenditure to cars almost running into the building…that’s another story. Anyway, I replied with those enigmatic words ‘look in the bloody cupboard.’ Which cupboard was the response? I walk to the kitchen and looked at them, then at the cupboard then back at them. They looked at me. I think to myself thank the cosmos I have average, street level, rat cunning intelligence and can manage things like finding coffee. I point to the cupboard. They look at the cupboard and ask ‘is the coffee in there?’ Yes, I respond but I make no move towards the cupboard as I want to see what they’ll do next. They continue to look at the cupboard as do I because I can almost see the cogs turning in their head as they analyse the cupboard. ‘Is there milk?’ I point then to the big white thing called the fridge. They nod and consider the fridge. I then say ‘all good now?’ They make no move to get either the coffee or the milk. How long they stood watching the cupboard and the fridge I don’t know but I expect the brilliant of mind were calculating the wind speed variables of their move to the fridge and whether the displacement of the air around them could indeed have some butterfly effect on the rest of the world.

Oh look! Bright, shiny things....

The greatest happiness you can have is knowing that you do not necessarily require happiness – William Saroyan

You know when you have those days that your mind is so preoccupied with stuff you have to contemplate that any bright, shiny object can attract you within seconds and set you on another course? I had that today. Anything and everything had my attention wandering all over the place. These are most useless days to me as nothing meaningful or profound comes out of them and you waste time…but that’s life huh?

The new fridge came this morning just as the old one gave up the ghost after 19 years…nothing lasts forever does it? It was almost as if it knew it no longer was needed. They took it away to rest at the old fridges retirement home and replaced it with a shining new whipper snapper one. Did I want the cardboard box it came in they asked? Er, no. The delivery guys told me most people keep them. Really, why? It’s a tall box that is not even good for packing things in because you have to cut it down – unless of course maybe you wanted to ship a person in it then I could see the point of it for packing – though there’s not a lot of call for that of course. But by all means correct me if I’m wrong. The guys asked if they could have it – sure – knock yourselves out. What are you going to do with it? The reply - All sorts of stuff. Okay, well there it is, I don’t have ‘stuff’ I only have things so I can see how I would have no use for the box. Stuff needs tall, useless boxes.

The fridge beeps annoyingly by the way if you have had the door open too long. What’s that about? I am the mistress of my own destiny not a bloody fridge and beeping at me is not going to get me to shut the door any faster - I will when I’d ready and no large white thing is going to change my mind. I would have got married years ago if that was the case.

By the way I have only 121 fridge magnets…I was strong and threw 30 out…not sure I have enough now.

I wandered out to buy a birthday gift. I’m very good at buying gift vouchers. I believe people would rather the money to buy what they want and besides most people pretty much know what gifts cost so it’s not like they are going to get all offended knowing the price of a voucher – well, those I know aren’t but I know some realistic types. While out I was forced to buy saturated fat -aka chips – some days you just need extra saturated fat to appease the call of the wild hormones. Yes, my body is a temple – but this is the off season and there’s no tourists visiting.

‘Had a long chat with Ethel this arvo. Isn’t it great when you can talk to someone who knows you and you don’t have to explain yourself, they just understand exactly where you are coming from? May everyone be blessed with a friendship like that. We have decided that we must win the $40 million lotto on Tuesday night. While people like to quote you that ‘money doesn’t buy happiness’ – you know what? We want to make up our own minds on that. Okay?

I was repairing some boot heels today with this handy dandy repair kit I have for shoes. For a moment it occurred to me that I could just buy another pair and chuck those ones out instead of fixing the heels and getting glue everywhere - but that’s another story - and yet I remember a time when I would not have contemplated doing that as I had no money. You are often your past. I’m not a tightwad with money but you remember the years when you had no money, don't you? I do. I prefer not to go backwards.

A blog reader asked me what the chaos theory was as apparently I mention it a bit. Do I? Could be I like to live in chaos as I feel one with it. But, my chaos theory, is more about not worrying about doing everything the right way and just living, possibly in a half arsed manner, simply. The text book version of the chaos theory is –

In mathematics and physics, chaos theory describes the behavior of certain nonlinear dynamical systems that may exhibit dynamics that are highly sensitive to initial conditions (popularly referred to as the butterfly effect). As a result of this sensitivity, which manifests itself as an exponential growth of perturbations in the initial conditions, the behavior of chaotic systems appears to be random
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chaos_theory

Well fuck hey? That’s pretty deep and meaningful. I particularly like this bit – ‘an exponential growth of perturbations.’ Yes, I always thought so. You have to watch the growth of perturbations. Sometimes they get so big you can’t fit them in the cupboard with your other exponential stuff and that’s really annoying. Maybe this is when you need a empty fridge box…

The chaos theory as per Amarinda Jones

- Due to lack of time, file everything in a haphazard manner, then run round madly swearing when you have to find a vital piece of paper you need to prove something. This burns up calories.
- I rarely have earrings that match – 2 pierced holes each ear – due to the fact that I dump all the earrings in together. If you wear mismatched ones then people will consider you unique and quirky as opposed to messy.
- No time to fold clean clothes after washing? Leave ‘em in the laundry basket because you’re probably going to wear them next week anyway. This means your life is less stressful as you don’t have to find time to fold things.
- May nothing ever be found when you want it to be. Challenge in life is good. Seek, swear, forehead slap, find,
- People who annoy you? Avoid them. Life is too short and you deserve better. Some people just steal your aura man.
- Bills – wait until you are in the mood to look at them. After work is always bad. Take them to work. Open them there and use your pissed-offed-ness to good effect.
- Worry? What’s the point? Whatever is going to happen will and all the worry in the world ain’t gonna’ change it. I think this is probably when Marie Antoinette suggested the French people eat cake. I think she wanted them to worry less and eating cake does that.

Anny, Kelly, Sandra and Barbara, are most likely doing something intensely exciting or not – I recommend go see or not…up to you – use your own chaos theory on that. Or wander over and check out teh wise words of newbie author Anika Hamilton. Read, enjoy, think, eat chips and stop chasing bright, shiny things as you get no work done.

www.freewebs.com/amarindajones/
Go ahead: Live with abandon. Be outrageous at any age. What are you saving your best self for?