Licking pointy bits...

So, I got an email response from a friend today that said something along the lines of it was ok not to be able to do a certain thing because like elbow licking some things aren’t possible. Naturally, I tried to lick my elbow. I couldn’t. Go on, try it. You know you want to. If you can’t and desperately want to have the ability to lick long range pointy bits then I have the instructions. Actually, there are heaps of instructions on the internet on the art of elbow licking.

"If you cannot see or feel if you are actually licking your elbow, put an edible substance, perhaps salt, sugar,lemon juice, etc. on your elbow -- if you taste the substance you know you're licking it. You can also ask someone to watch, unless you are afraid you might be embarrassed if your attempt fails. You can also take a picture or look in the mirror to see. Don't get frustrated if you can't do it, it's a very rare trick to do."

http://www.wikihow.com/Lick-Your-Elbow

Uh-huh...

I particularly like this bit –

“Your tongue is bound to feel overstretched after this exercise, this is normal, it will stop shortly after you do.”

Exactly…

See what happens when you question man’s inhumanity to man, the price of eggs, the wisdom of the ages and ask the universe where you’re going and what time you'll get there? It all comes down to elbow licking…

Licking tatts...

I often get other writers emailing me asking me to describe how touching or licking a tattoo feels. I have tatts. I like them a lot. But I have no idea why people think your skin is more sensitive because of them. Yes, straight after it’s done and for about a week afterwards it feels like gravel rash – and I guess if the artist did a crap job he could damage your skin for life. But more sensitive to a lover’s touch? No. That's hype invented by romance writers. Licking a tatt? Touching a tatt? Go for it but it’s no G spot and I’d hate to think anyone would get one inked on them thinking it was. Don’t believe what you read.

Amarinda Jones
Penn Halligan
www.amarindajones.com
www.amarindajones.blogspot.com
Be daring...read an Amarinda book