Greased nipples...

I cannot begin to tell you how many times I have typed in ‘greased nipples’ today. In a story you ask? No, at work. At a brothel pandering to nipple fetishes, you wonder? No, in a car/fleet mechanical type place where I’m temping. Lots of nipples get greased. And, cars have nipples. Who knew? And, in some ways I don’t want to know because I feel a car has a right to its private bits and pieces.

Anyway, I can tell you 99.9% of the mechanics cannot spell nipples, which is funny cause they’re men and men have a fondness for nipples. Most common spellings? Nipple’s, Nipels, Neppels and Nippals. Yes, nipples are a problem. Not just in the need or lust for them but in the spelling of them. I think maybe, in future, I will input them in as ‘greased pointy things'. Hell, I’m the temp. I can do stuff like...well, I can't but I do because life is short - so do stuff.

Nipplese...

So, today I said to a friend that there was no way he would say ‘nipples’ in a serious, structured and formal conversation that was important. How did this come up? Well, you know, friends talk weird, random stuff about nothing sometimes. 

Anyway, I walked into the office later. He was doing a phone referee check on me – you know – saying how amazing, sweet, adorable, conscientious etc that I am and he used the nipple word very skilfully in the middle of a sentence without missing a beat. I doubt the person on the other end of the phone even noticed. That takes skill and a healthy dose of competitive madness. It also indicates that people often don’t listen to what others say and we could all be talking nipplese.      

Nipples? Not so much…

 So, I’ve been trying to work out why people read my blog as it’s not really riveting stuff yet people keep coming back. It’s more a random thoughts of the day blog. So, every so often I put tag lines like ‘nipples’ on to see if people read because of the titillation factor…no, I’m not pardoning the pun. I did it a while ago with ‘pointy penises in pink panties’ and I have to tell you that nipples and penises do not attract substantially any more  readers to said blog. They are on par with ‘goat track’, ‘pay attention stupid’, ‘sauté a wildebeest’ or ‘cellulite.’ Of course with other writers  reading the blog, the big tag lines are ‘non payment of royalties’ and the ever popular Noble publishing debacle – and I have to absolutely thank Anom – remember her? She went on every ex-Noble writer’s blog and stamped her feet, vented her spleen, pretended to be someone she wasn’t when we all knew who she was and basically vowed she would ‘purse’ people instead of pursue them. Now she attracted, and still does, a bucket load of attention to the blog. Sad thing is I never heard from her again but I hope you still read the blog, Anom. I miss you. No really, I like the insane.

So there. Nipples. Not so much. Penises? Sure, they’re out there. Why do people read stuff? I don’t know. I expect if we did know we’d all do better.      

Nipples....

....just testing a theory...

Lipstickery...

So, I was having lunch with a good, male friend. I mentioned something to him about the pink lid on the water bottle I was drinking from and he said it looked like a nipple. It didn’t. But he’s a man. It’s all about sex - or maybe nipples - with them. Anyway, I said it could only be a nipple if someone had covered it in lipstick…people used to do that to make them redder…why? I dunno. Anyway we then got on to the taste of lipstick. I don’t think there is a taste. Men do it seems. They can kiss lips covered in lipstick and dislike the taste. Now, riddle me this…why do they keep kissing those same lips if the taste turns them off? Could it be that they’re just stoic souls who will forge on kissing a woman no matter the cost to their senses? Does lipstick have a taste? Will nipple rouging ever come back into fashion? Hmmmm…

Cherry Ripe....out now

Cherry Ripe - part of the Dirty, Sexy, Yours series is out now - click here to take a squiz - http://secretcravingspublishing.mybigcommerce.com/products/Cherry-Ripe-%28Dirty%2C-Sexy%2C-Yours%29.html

Yes, it's another cover with a nipple on it...

The blurb

When the lights go out Cherry gets to meet the sexy new neighbor she’s been lusting over from afar. Making out with the hot guy is better than reading a book with her pet tortoise. But what of the characters in the story? Can they put their lives on hold long enough for her to have an orgasm?

Mick is more than happy to take Cherry on the ride of her life. She is ripe for the picking and he wants on and in the lady. He can think of lots of sexy and dirty things to do to her in the dark. Her book can wait.

And what of storybook couple Constance and Jethro running for their lives? Can they outrun the madman with an axe? Is the strong physical attraction they have for each other based on fear or lust? Can they stay alive long enough to find out?

The nipple that launched a thousand arguments…

So, I’ve been waging a war with Amazon Kindle over a book cover. At this stage the cover for Sinner is forbidden by them. Every other publishing site doesn’t have an issue with it but they do. Apparently it’s morally objectionable. Forbidden. Naughty. And there is that nipple – the nipple that launched a thousand arguments. Hmm…the second cover is what they are using on their site in Europe. Yes, there is a US and UK equivalent.

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B004WPP26G

Now riddle me this Batman, if Sinner is so objectionable how is the cover below, on their smut/erotica site acceptable? It’s not like we don’t know what Helen wants is it? And she has both nipples showing. Hmmm...double standards there Amazon Kindle.

They're everywhere....

I got in trouble on facebook for showing the cover of Sinner. Why? Her nipple was clearly visible…apparently we can forget the fact that a man is between her legs…er…looking for maybe his car keys…it was the nipple that caused a spak out with facebook. Yes, I respect they have rules about nudity. But this is a nipple. Lift up your shirt. Most of us have them. They’re not new or obscene and I expect future generations will continue to have them. I think what interests me most is as a society a large percentage of people want to read the forbidden and be titillated – pardon the pun – by all things erotic – but for god sake – don’t put it on a cover! It has to be hidden behind a generic photo of a hero and heroine in the standard romantic clinch. Isn’t it far better to have a cover, like Sinner, which other than the ‘terrible’ nipple is the standard clinch photo, that is actually honest and reflects what the story is like inside? Or do we hide behind what is proper because others say so? And is a nipple less a nipple when covered by a sheer layer of fabric? Or does advertising or Hollywood sanitize nipples?

Inconvenient nipples...

What body parts can be shown on a book cover? I love these two book covers sent to me from Secret Cravings Publishing but there have been concerns on showing nipples and an arse.

I do wonder why in this day and age it is acceptable for a male arse to be shown in full on a book cover yet a woman’s carefully covered. And nipples? We all have them yet showing the female version comes under scrutiny. Should sexuality be homogenized for erotica? I believe not. If you are buying erotica you know body parts on, in and grinding against and within are going to be the focus of the story so being offended by the hint of nipples seems odd to me.

























Amarinda Jones
Penn Halligan
www.amarindajones.com
www.amarindajones.blogspot.com
Be daring...read an Amarinda book

Nipple flowers…

Writer Anny Cook mentioned them to me. She’s a wild woman. What are nipple flowers? Well, I had to go check them out as I like to know stuff.

http://nippleflowers.com/

Fascinating…I then found this site.

http://stores.ebay.com/Nymph-Jewelry_Clit-Clips_W0QQ_fsubZ7074205QQ_sidZ213724976QQ_trksidZp4634Q2ec0Q2em322

Non piercing clit clips….gave me a good laugh. I cannot begin to tell you the thoughts I had. Hmmm…where is my credit card?

Amarinda Jones
Penn Halligan
www.amarindajones.com
www.amarindajones.blogspot.com
Be daring...read an Amarinda book