Monday

Bloody hell...blogger is acting most odd...just going to see if this works...

On my morning ramblette - at 4:30am - don't ask - some bizarre thing to do with exercise - I passed by this sad arsed looking trailer that was advertising ‘diving adventures’. There was this turtle painted on the side and it was the most pissed off looking animal I had ever seen in my life. And, I thought to myself, I suppose you would looked pissed if a bunch of people dressed in rubber and wearing masks invaded your environment – your home. Think about it - it would be bizarre - unless you were into fetish stuff and then you may get excited of course….

Anyway, I side with the cranky looking turtle. I hate people unexpectantly lobbing in on me. That's what divers would be like for the turtle. Though, most people I know realize I need at least a week - preferably two weeks notice if they are coming to stay or at least a phone call before hand if you are visiting as I may be in writer mood and unable to speak in anything but grunts and glares. I like my space. So the sea creatures of the ocean are safe from me. I understand where they are coming from. Besides, there is not enough alcohol on the planet that would make me put my body into a swimsuit let alone a rubber diving suit. While I am a great believer in appearances are irrelevant - I just don’t want to see that much of my flesh on display.

And hell no, I don’t think the human body is beautiful. It's weird looking. Whoever designed it had to be on drugs. Not just outwardly is it weird but inside as well. Clearly when the thought of “let’s make a human” came up no one thought of the KISS principle - keep it simple stupid. All the bits and pieces we have seem to be like an overkill to me. For instance - I had my gall bladder out - you don’t need it - or your appendix or even your spleen - so why do we have them? See what I mean about the drugs?

Fixed front door lock. Yay! Garage door lock now stuffed…always something isn’t there?

'Got an email from best friend Ethel asking do I have slutty boots? Hmmm. Why do you ask I responded? Are you thinking of picking up extra cash as a working girl? If so I advise against it as those ladies work damn hard for their money. After a lengthy delay - she had been forced to work at her job - she explained she needed them for a 70's party. I asked why would she naturally assume I would have slutty boots? She said because I had all sorts of strange things. I was going to debate that but decided I could not justify my response as I can be weird at times.…and yes maybe I do have some boots she can use...

Okay - so probably way more than you needed to know today but there it is - the ramblings of a Monday.


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Go ahead: Live with abandon. Be outrageous at any age. What are you saving your best self for?