So, I’m starting this new 12 week program that’s all about
exercise – which I do a lot anyway of—running the esplanade at 6am on a Sunday morning
crazy—so my mindset on that is established—and an eating plan. That I have
problem with as I tend to be a random eater. I need a pattern, a focus and a
plan. I stop short of calling it a set of rules because philosophically I’m
against rules and I enjoy breaking them on a regular basis because I can.
Anyway, I looked over the nutrition plan for the 12 weeks
and it all looks good but for the fact it’s all designed for people who are in
couples. What the? I emailed the mob who wrote the plan. Their theory is there are
a lot of people in couples and it’s easier to make each meal a two person meal.
I pointed out that there are a lot of single, overweight people who will now
have to divide all meals into two and be left with half a tomato, an apple etc.
I was annoyed by their couple-dom message that came back and that couples
support each other in their fairytale existence of married bliss-cue-the-bluebirds-to-sing-and yes,
that would explain the divorce rate—and that most people are in couples.
I thought what a load of bullshit, prejudice and what drugs
are these people on and then I had an epiphany
– people in a couple can’t mathematically multiply because they’re so used to everything being
already for two that it if was singular they’d be stuffed and not able to add one
and one together. Oh....I get it now. It's an affliction.
Couple-dom and numeracy skills. They never mention that in
the fairytales.
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