Size right!

So I went and bought a belt at lunchtime. So what you say? It’s a big what. Stick with me in my rambulation. Anyway as I am losing weight…my apologies if you find it…send it back and I’ll bury it in the garden… my strides (pants/slacks/trousers/long bits of fabric that cover your legs – pick what’s applicable to your hemisphere) - are loose and Huston we have a problem if they fall down as showing that much cellulite on display is, to my understanding, against the law. So I went to a store and wandered over to a belt rack and I picked out the size that I though would fit me – medium. No, it didn’t. Too small. I picked up large – no, too small again. Huh…so I rifled through the belts and came across another medium – this time too big and yes, the large was too big. The small was right. No, this isn’t going into a Goldilocks and the three bears story but if it was I’d have had that blonde bimbo kicked out of the bear’s house for intrusion. Tramp. Hussy. Home invader.…where was I? Weight…medium…large…small…oh yeah…so I’ve never been small in anything – though in saying that I always get told I have really small ear holes and this annoys doctors when they want to look inside. My answers to that is don’t.…but I digress…back to belts. So I was thinking ‘what the hell is wrong with these sizes?’

I went through the whole bloody rack and discovered that when I take into account all the different manufactures not one of them had consistency in sizes. What is my point you ask? My point is that in a world where people of all sizes from petite to the voluptuous ladies of size 26 and up you would think these nongheads manufacturers could all agree on sizes. It’s stupid and shitty enough that they make larger women feel like crap when they show off skeletal fashion designed for size 2 - which is for a baby - and call that the ideal size. The ideal size is what a woman in herself is happy with so stop buggerizing around with the sizes and just make them standard. Just let a woman walk to a rack and pick up a shirt and skirt and a belt knowing that the size she holds in her hand will be correct and she doesn’t have to go through all this bullshit of trying it on an wasting time. Do they piss around with men’s clothes like this? I think not.