It’s farked…

So, I was driving back from my lunch break to work. I turned a corner and I heard crunch, bang, grind and something that sounded like I was dragging another car underneath my car….that, or an elephant on roller skates had somehow tried to limbo under the car and got stuck. I pulled over and got out of Verity, my car. I looked at her. She said nothing. I understood this because as a woman the extent of my knowledge of car troubles is no petrol and placing the keys into the hands of a mechanic to do whatever they do to fix stuff. Behind me a beaten up old car pulled up and two feral looking gentlemen came towards me. Greeeaaaat…just what I needed. The boys from Deliverance. But they had seen what happened and went to the front of the car and indicated I lift the hood as they reckoned the engine was ‘fucked’. At this time, a good friend passed by in his car and he stopped as well. I popped the hood after searching for the lever thingy - I forget where that is. Well, who uses it? The hood came up and the first two men said ‘she’s fucked the engine.’ She – being me. They peered further inside and said ‘she’s put a rod through the block’ and confirmed their first conclusion ‘it’s fucked.’ My friend agreed and said ‘she’s put a rod through the block.’ I pointed out to all three of them that I did no such thing and stop saying that. They didn’t. Apparently it’s bad to put rods into blocks – which I assume is the engine block. Fine. But it’s not my fault.

Anyway long story short, the car got towed under warranty and I have a loaner until they fix poor Verity, which means removing the engine and replacing it I believe. Apparently what happened to me is a one in a million thing. Naturally. I can’t win the lotto but I can have the rod through the block thing happen. Lucky. But I did get something out of this experience. When someone says a car is ‘fucked’ it generally is. And men speak a different mechanic language to women and I shouldn’t be offended by the ‘she did this or that.’ That’s just the way men are. And knights in shining armour can also appear in battered old cars and look like swamp rats. As for friends who stop in your time of need? Priceless. Thank you big time.