Sunday, 13 September 2009

If Prince Charming….

…showed up at my door right now with a glass slipper for me to try on ‘cause he knew I was ‘the one’ and he wanted to share his heart and kingdom with me, I’d tell him to rack off. Why? I’m just not into romance at the moment. Sure, okay, yes, maybe for a moment I would probably hesitate at the offer of the kingdom deal but it would not be enough to sway me. Why? I don’t trust romance and I don’t trust men.

Yes, it’s probably not the thing to announce when you’re a romance writer but there it is. I’m having a hard time getting my hero and heroine together because she’s looking at him suspiciously and thinking ‘I just know you’re lying your arse off to sleep with me and I don’t think you’re worth the heartache’ and he’s confused because ‘isn’t this supposed to be a romance book I’m in?’ Yes, it is Mr Hero-type-person and shut up. Huh…men.

I believe when you write, as in anything, you throw life experience into your books. The things I have done in my books are things I have lived…maybe not with such gymnastic prowess – okay no where near it - but it’s my life. At the moment I am just so distrustful of men and in turn myself when it comes to them that I keep staring at blank pages and thinking maybe I’ll have the heroine take a vow of celibacy or something. While it’s great to have lots of books half written needing so little to be finished, it’s hard to write love and passion and romance when you just know the heroine would be so much better off without the hero. Maybe she could get a dog or a duck or an iguana for company. I feel, unlike men, you’d always know where you stood with an iguana.

I’m sure sometime soon I’ll get over this jaded funk I am in but until then does anyone know any reputable iguana suppliers?
Be an Amarinda book


Lisa J said...

As someone with 2 dogs and no man, I say go for a dog if you can't find an iguana.

Years ago a woman I worked with had a particularly nasty break up with her boyfriend. There was one poor lonely man in our department and when the woman was complaining about her ex he calmly looked at her and said, "You should know by are scum." If that isn't straight from the horse's mouth I don't know what is.

Amarinda Jones said...

A smart unusual

Ashley Ladd said...

This post reminds me of the opening of "Jewel of the Nile" where Joan Wilder can't imagine Jack Colton (Michael Douglas) as a romantic hero no matter how hard she tries. He leaves her die of consumption on a burning boat while saving himself.

Definitely not romantic, but it was funny as hell. Dang! I've got to find my copy of the movie. Now I'm dying to see it again.