Me? I'm innocent...

So, I did edits all day today at my day job. I enjoyed it. Why? Firstly because I shouldn’t have been doing it and it's always enjoyable doing the wrong thing and secondly because editing sex – and all the naughty words that go with it – is so much fun when you’re working in a staid, boring office of people who’s lives are preoccupied by being monotonous and tedious. Only problem? Remembering to answer the phone and not read out a line of dialogue at the same time. Did I do that? I started to and then confused and dazzled the person on the other end of the phone to the point they had forgotten what I had said and why they were calling.

But before you try this in your work place, you must cultivate a look of innocence. I do the innocent look really very well. Actually, my two best party tricks are looking angelic and like butter wouldn't' melt in my mouth - and seriously who would suck on butter -and, my other great skill is bending over, legs straight and placing the palms of my hands on the floor in front of me. This instantly confuses and astounds people, as they want to try it, and they forget why they were going to question why you're muttering lines of dialogue at the computer.

So many people to confuse...so little time...