Thursday, 1 May 2008

Rave on…

Dear Amarinda,
this is your horoscope for Thursday, May 1st:
Something is not going right at home and it is probably due to your lack of attention. At work, today will be completely different from usual. In Love, your relationship will be more intense.

…lots of things are not right at home – it’s a frigging madhouse due to lack of attention. Who has time any more?
hmm…work will be “completely different from usual” – oh crap – I hope I’m not expected to work as I was not planning on that today…most annoying if that happens. I really only go there to use the photocopier/printer and get paid.
…"your relationship will be more intense” – that’s it, I will buy the chocolate ice cream I was craving and not the low fat cheesecake flavoured yogurt. That stars have spoken.

I received this nice email today from a lady who had read one of my books. She said “I wish like I could write like you.” Well, no one can – now before you think ‘my, isn’t Amarinda up herself’ – well I am – self esteem is good – what I mean is no one
writes like anyone else do they? And indeed why should they? If they did then no one would buy books and you would never have heard of all the great e-book and print writers there are. So my point is, and I have one somewhere, is that anyone can write. It does not require being any smarter, funnier or more meaningful than anyone else. I believe it all comes down to putting pen to paper, life experience and the nerve to submit a book and await word of whether it sucks or not.

The ‘suck ‘ bit doesn’t sound encouraging does it? But I think you have to be prepared for the polite you suck email. If you’re not then it can hit you hard when you get a rejection. When I get contracts for books now – got offered one yesterday - I am still amazed. Why? Well, I never set out to be a ‘writer’ or an ‘author.’ In many ways I still don’t think of myself as being in either of those categories – I think they sound a bit high faluting to me. I am me and shall remain thusly until I snuff it. And no, I am certainly not the shy, modest type who believes she is undeserving because I believe I deserve a bloody lot. However, I am patently aware that what you want and what you get are two different things and you have to remain a realist at all times. When I submit a manuscript I do
not expect it will automatically get the nod. How pretentious would that be? So I consider myself more a realist than a writer and I trade on that and life experience when I thump out a book on the keyboard.

I was never one of those people who knew from an early age what I would grow up to be. Were you? Tell us all. I personally had no plans or goals. I havered between being an actor, an artist, a teacher (for a second and a half) and a someone who just bummed around (very successful at this one). The one thing I really wanted to do was travel. And I did. At 19 I set out by myself to work in London. People told my mother I was mad. How can she do that all alone? My mother’s response was her children had the ability to do anything and she expected I would succeed in everything I did as we were descended from the Kings of Scotland. Grandma Elsie would have added that we have ‘Viking blood’ and those two words alone were enough to mean we are invincible. Yes, we’re very shy and modest in the Jones family.

So what the hell is this post all about? I don’t know – maybe it’s about being prepared to have a go, take a chance and to put your words out there and see if you get a contract or whatever it is you want. Maybe it’s about accepting that while person A may think you suck, person B may not. Maybe it’s about believing that you are just as good as any other published writer out there, and more than likely you are better, so take a chance and submit. Maybe it’s about not setting goals and just going where fate pushes you. Could just possibly by that I’m just rambling after a long day at work.

Okay, just being a bitch for a moment – I can actually be a bitch for longer – perky peoplewhat is it with them? Are they born squeaky, sparkly cutie-pie pukeably annoying or is it a habit they develop? Is it nurture or nature? Why do I ask? There is this exceptionally Carol-Brady-type-perky person I have to deal with. The bitch within me thinks this unspeakable cutesy pie act is a just that – a put on to drive the jaded and cynical – moi – to the point of wincing. Honestly, my eye twitches violently when I have to deal with her. If it’s a natural thing, I can only thank fate my ancestors were born smart arse realists and managed to pass that genetic trait on. Clearly they avoided mating with the overly wholesome. So what is it about these perky people? Are they like aliens that have been slotted into society to divide and conquer? Because some people like the perkiness and respond accordingly. Could it be like a perky cult? They infiltrate society and try and collect those who are easy to turn to perkiness and then they report back to the mother ship how many they have managed to make friends with. The mother ship then collates the info from perky people all over the world. I truly believe Earth will be invaded one day by a huge wave of perkiness and it will only be people like myself who will be on the outer fighting the perkiness. I tell ya, they worry me. They talk perky, dress perky – this one even sneezes perkily – which everyone thinks is ‘so cute’ and all I can think is ‘you’re all doomed.’ Maybe I should stockpiling alcohol and chocolate now so when the invasion happens I’ll survive.

So there it is or in my case was – Thursday – hallelujah and pass the gin tomorrow is Friday in Oz and Monday is the Labor day holiday in Queensland. Of course May Day or Labor day has communist origins…whatever…give me a day off and I’ll go along with whatever you want to believe comrade.

Anny and Kelly are doing the Anny and Kelly gig as they do...go read, learn, wonder, shake your head and watch put for the terminally perky. They’re out for world domination.
Go ahead: Live with abandon. Be outrageous at any age. What are you saving your best self for?


Kelly Kirch said...

And THAT is why I hate being called perky. I'm not one of those cutsie pie people who giggle and blink insipidly while the world is their rainbow colored oyster.

Very uplifting blog for you today, AJ.

Anny Cook said...

Heh. You get a contract offered because you ARE A GOOD WRITER! Jane is over here going OMG! as she reads Seducing Celestine!

Have a lovely May Day!

Mona Risk said...

Congrats on the new contract. Enjoy May Day, but don't eat too much chocolate. I thought it was holiday in Australia. Here we celebrate in September. Thanks for Audrey Hepburn's picture. She'd always been my favorite actress, talented and classy.

Anonymous said...

Anny wasn't supposed to tattle on me but I'm thoroughly enjoying the book.


barbara huffert said...

Don't worry, I've got you covered. I infiltrated the rank and file of the perkies and am making my way to the top. Once there I will revert to my true self and make sure you are installed in your rightful position as Empress Amarinda, Ruler of All She Survyes.