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Saturday 31 May 2008

The wondrous Cliff....


Unbreakable is released at Ellora’s Cave. To go into the draw to win the Aussie stuff in the picture - all you need to do is answer two simple questions. The answers can be found somewhere in the book or on this blog….say if you scrolled down a bit.

Question 1: What subject does lecturer Dash Lomard teach?

Question 2: How old is India Blake?

Email the answers to
amarinda_jones@yahoo.com.au. Please put ‘Contest’ in the subject field of the email.

The first correct answer, drawn at random, to those two specific questions wins the Aussie gift set in the picture. And yes, the t-shirt comes in XXL – I checked. The contest closes at midnight (USA EST) on June 6th. The winner will announced on the blog after they have been contacted by email. Good luck.


I got an urgent phone call today. A friend was in a state of panic and I had to help her or she was in deep trouble. I mentally calculated what bail money I could scrape together and I realized I could only probably get one of her arms released from jail. The rest of her would have to stay in the nick. Her desperate question to me? What did I remember of Pilgrim’s Progress??? Huh? “You read it at Uni didn’t you?” Well, technically yes, I browsed it at Uni until I realized that there was no way I could read that book without falling asleep and I got the Cliffs notes. “So you cheated?” No, Cliffs notes aren’t cheating. They are study aids that cut through all the boring crap and tell you the crux of the story – anyway that’s my story and I’m sticking to it. “Okay, whatever – what do you remember?” It seems she has been given this book in one of her Open Uni (study from home) classes. Remember? Other than knowing where all the Cliffs notes were housed in the University library – not much. There was a pit of pitifulness or something like that and a slough of somewhere or other…and there’s also a Slough outside of London. “London? How does that help me?” Well, it doesn’t, it’s just an

aside. I burbled on about Christian wandering through various obstacles, temptations etc. “Why was he doing that?” I can’t remember…possibly something to do with challenges in life or maybe he was looking for the Holy Grail or maybe there was no place like home and he just had to remember that and tap his heals together. “You’re hopeless,” she said.
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Hey, I know that. Anytime I got assigned books to read at Uni I used to look at them and think ‘Holy crap…seriously?” I love books but these are not ones I would choose. Yes, I know they’re all classics but I could never see how they related to getting my degree. Another book that drove me to Cliff and his wondrous notes was The Scarlet Letter. You’re probably all saying – what? That’s a classic. Is she a philistine? Yes, more than likely. The thing that turned me off that was the fact that the woman took all the blame for sleeping with the weak, spineless so called hero. My lecturer at the time said – ‘but what about the passion in the book, Amarinda?” Now if the heroine had of slugged the weak kneed hero and then stuck the scarlet letter to his head with superglue, then yeah, I would have called that passion. But otherwise, sorry Nathaniel mate, I did not like the book. Again, Cliff saved my arse. I wish I had of known about him
when I was in my senior year in high school and instead of reading the exceedingly boring Day of The Triffids, I watched the movie. Humongous mistake that. The book and the movie were only a like in the title and to base my essay on that had my teacher laughing his arse off.
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So what is the point of this? Well, maybe that you have to read a story instead of asking someone else to form your opinions. Maybe, that everyone is so different that we’re not always going to agree on stuff so why get pissed off if we don’t. Or maybe don’t ask me to help you to do book reports. And no, please don’t try to explain Pilgrims Progress to me. I prefer to blissfully unaware. How did I ever get my Bachelor of Arts with this half arsed philosophy? I turned up to the required number of classes, I parroted back what the lecturer said in my papers – because that’s what they wanted to hear – their words and not my opinions - and I knew if there was only one degree up for grabs then I would get my chubby fist on it first because I wanted it. What have I used my degree for in life so far? Hmmm…absolutely nothing. It’s in a frame somewhere in the house. No, it’s not on a wall. I have more important crap on the walls like 1950’s Spanish bullfighter posters and flying plaster ducks…a degree can’t compete with that. However, that’s not to say that anything I have learned is wasted. I’m sure it’s just in abeyance somewhere until it’s needed. And by the way – thanks Cliff.
*******
By the way – the rain I mentioned in the previous blog was a fizzer…never mind…life goes on.

Also…remember Mervina the possum? No, she’s not back terrorizing me but here’s a possum that was found in the same part of Brisbane as where I live. Click here. Thankfully Mervina was a little smarter than this one….

Author Nancy Hunter has an ongoing summer contest for theme prizes related to her first release, Taste of Liberty, coming July 17. Sign up for her newsletter at www.nancyhunterbooks.com to be eligible for cool prizes like Native American jewelry and free book downloads. First drawing will be June 7.

www.freewebs.com/amarindajones/
Go ahead: Live with abandon. Be outrageous at any age. What are you saving your best self for?

7 comments:

barbara huffert said...

I wonder, do books become classics because they were controversial at the time they were written? Does that mean we'll be designated as classics in another 200 years? Think Cliff's descendants will have a little more fun summarizing us?

Unknown said...

OMG!!! How funny would that be! What an excellent point, Barbara

Sandra Cox said...

Great contest.
Poor possum.

Anny Cook said...

Well, shucks! I wanted you to have rain! I guess it was all here. We even had a tornado watch. Ick!

Poor possum... How in the world did he manage that?

Shall I hang my head in shame? I not only read Pilgrim's Progress (in High School for the FUN of it), I also read the Scarlet Letter. Oh, dear. I can see that I'll have to hide my face for a while...

Molly Daniels said...

I've not read either. But I wish I'd had Cliff's Notes for The Odyssy! I had to read it out loud to keep from falling asleep!

LynTaylor said...

LOL! I can just see the possum's brain ticking over 'WTF? Should have turned left' LOL!!

I think we got your rain m'dear. The washing pile is getting scary :(

JacquƩline Roth said...

Now I liked The Scarlet Letter for exactly the reason you didn't. It was as if Nathaniel Hawthorne was writing one of the first feminist tomes. He laid bare the social inequality between men and women while drawing the women as incredibly strong and brave of character enough to face up to the indignities of a society that put her in a position where she was expected to deny herself as a woman while the man wasn't enough of a "man" to stand before the others with pride.