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Saturday 23 January 2010

Figures….


Today at the Acme Dance Shoe company where I work …

Panic stations…

Executive type person – we don’t have the figures!!!! Why not? We need them or the world will end

Amarinda (who wants an alibi just in case the world ends) – I told you why - you said that was okay to hold off.

Executive - Oh right - yes you did - well can you do them now?

Amarinda – (ok - puke – swear – boring - kick the wall – think evil thoughts about dreary figures) - Yes, if someone can run through how to do them with me (cause they look like Swahili to me and I may fall asleep – hit my head on the desk and not come in to work tomorrow)

Executive – Ask X

X - I'm not sure I don’t do them - Y does

Y - Not me – ask Z

Z - this whole set up is stupid and wrong and no wonder worlds collide and we’re all doomed.

Amarinda (I’ll-give-you-worlds-colliding-why-don’t-I-have-a-bottle-of-wine-at-my- desk?) Great whatever - if I do this and that and swirl the figure around some and make the heading blue and pretty pink and put a cherry on top is that essentially correct?

Z - Well yeah but it's not the fosby-flop sooky-la-la expediential monotone grey and white and anal way we've done it in the past.

Amarinda – Well, fuck it - there’s a new sheriff in town baby and we like colour. Colour confuses and hides stuff. We like that.

Z – you’ll go to hell

Amarinda – more than likely

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1 comments:

Sandra Cox said...

Hmm, sounds like businesses in Aussie land are ran pretty much the way they are in the states.