Thursday, 30 July 2009


- can you eat cereal three nights in a row for dinner? How healthy is that?
- what's the world record for people asking me about the bruise on my forehead? Was I drunk? No, just plain clumsy.
- why did I continuously pick up and lift over my head, and then throw down hard, a 10 kg ball just because Hugh (trainer) said it was a good thing to do? Would I jump off a cliff if he told me to?
- is pain from exercise really good for you?
- is losing weight worth it? Do I need muscle? What happens if I lose all my beloved cellulite? Is there counselling for that?
- will the weight find me once more?
-why is it when you go to the bottlo (liquor store) that they always ask me if I want my purchases cold? Do I look like I need a drink that badly?
- why do they always look scared when you ask a shop assistant that question?
- and what wine do you serve with cereal?
- if green vegetables are good for you then why can’t we have green chocolate?
- how many naked book cover requests can you send in before the cover gods go “duh -stop it already - we know what you want.”
- how many times can I drive my editor insane with typos?
- and what's with her obsession with frogs? What’s that about?
- why is it screaming children are always in the supermarket after work? Isn’t there a law about children rampaging and terrorizing single people?
- how many times do I have to say no before someone gets it?
- how many gazillion lotto tickets do you have to buy before the lotto gods stop laughing at you and let you win?
- why is it the hooks on your bra give way at the most inopportune moment?
- why do we even have breasts?
- why can't men have breasts instead?
-…and cellulite?
-…why can’t they have periods too?
- If I have hardly any petrol in the car is that a good reason to call in sick?
- why do smokers stand in the sunlight fagging away (smoking) and then comment how fresh the air is outside? How can they tell what fresh is?
- why can you always sleep at your desk during the day at work but not in you bed at night?
- how come the person you work with eats rubbish all day but he falls apart in horror if you eat a snack can of healthy tuna?
- why is the woman in the picture above standing as she is? What is she selling? Why doesn’t she straighten up?
- Oh why, why, why Delilah?
Be an Amarinda book


Anny Cook said...

Wine with cereal... hmmmm. Holiday wine from Brotherhood Winery in NY.

Green chocolate. Suggest it to the candymakers for St. Pat's Day.

Regina Carlysle said...

I'm looking at that pic and thinking about the beginning of a car race on tv the other day. I detest watching races but it was on and so I looked. They were doing the national anthem and this woman was standing beside the singer doing the song in sign language. She was swirling her hands around very dramatically and she was completely bent over at the waist with her ass sticking out. I just couldn't figure out what that had to do with singing to the deaf. Crazy shit.

Regina Carlysle said...

Oh, thanks for the laugh. This was very funny.