Monday, 17 December 2007

Free the elves…

Five Fantastic Reasons to buy an e-book this Christmas….

You are saving the environment because fewer trees are being cut down.
2. You are proactively looking after your health. How? You’re not lugging a pile of heavy books around because you can have zillions of e-books all loaded onto a reader or a laptop.
3. They make excellent Christmas presents that don’t need to be wrapped. Just buy on line and sent to the person’s email.
4. They are psychologically good for you. What the? Last minute Christmas present buying can be stressful so you log onto to…say… for instance Ellora’s Cave, Cerridwen Press, Total-E-Bound or The Wild Rose Press and with a few simple clicks you have a selection of books for the hard to buy gin-tippling Cousin Polly.

5. You deserve to relax with a good book and forget about whether you can sit crazy Uncle Al beside starched-knickered Auntie Maud at Christmas lunch. Let ‘em work it out themselves while you read and relax with a glass of plonk

And because e-books are so good for you, here are some great books to buy this Christmas because…

It’s a warm and funny Christmas romance. “The Cowboy’s Christmas Bride” – Cindy Spencer Pape

Because the man has a tattoo and nipple ring. “Last Man Standing” – Janet Davies

Who doesn’t like to be naughty in the library? "Scandalous Profession" – Elaine Lowe

A great book to buy this Christmas because…shifters, vampires and psychics make this book a compelling holiday page turner - "Beneath A Christmas Moon" - Ariana Dupre

If you have ever loved a Marine - husband, brother, father, lover . . . this book is a must read. "North Atlantic Nights" - Emmie Graham.

His trembling fingers rested on the keyboard as he leaned toward the monitor, an uncontrollable twitch running through his misshapen body as he devoured the article with the greedy need of a child offered chocolate. Boji Stones – Sandra Cox

Click on the titles or links above and buy the book. Go on, you know you want to…be daring…. See how easy it is to shop on the Amarinda Blog?

Santa’s elves – exploited or what?

Okay, so we know Santa is the big draw card at Christmas but I have to ask you what does he really do? Oh sure, he walks around being merry and doing the ‘ho,ho, ho’ thing but is that it? I suspect he really takes all the glory off the faceless masses of the North Pole – the elves – who have been working their arses off all year so he can stand in the limelight and look like a swell guy. What about them? Let’s just stop a moment and think the people with the pointy ears churning out presents for everyone. Santa gets all the kudos but what gratitude do they get?

I caught up with one of the elves, who preferred to remain anonymous, but they wanted to dish the dirt on the Santa deal

A- Thanks for meeting me
E - I can’t take it anymore. That man has to be stopped!
A – I see…so tell us a little about the conditions at the North Pole. How much do you get paid?
E – Pay! Ha! We get nothing but these tatty, unfashionable green suits that no one would be seen dead in. It’s an embarrassment to look like this.
A – Green not your colour?
E – Nope and those pointed shoes just kill my feet.
A – Let’s talk about Health and safety. Lugging around all those toys must be hard. What sort of compo do you receive if you get injured?
E – None – we either work or starve. The Claus’ have the monopoly on jobs at the Pole.
A – That’s an evil look you have on your face.
E – Let’s just say we have plans to break that monopoly very soon.
A – Right, on the creepy note, let’s change the subject…we always hear of Christmas treats being left out for Santa -cookies and milk etc. What do the elves get?
E – Diddly frigging squat! We have to wait until the fat guy’s asleep to nick his food.
A – Wow, that’s terrible. How do you keep up morale?
E – We have a still. We make Elf wine and we stick pins into our Santa effigy.
A – Uh huh, but what about Mrs Claus? She seems like the nice caring sort.
E – That bitch – she works us harder than Santa. I can’t stand her. Sweet one moment and back stabbing cow the next. She’s fucking treacherous.
A – But you must get some perks on this job. Do you get to take home some of the toys you make for your own family?
E – You are frisked on the way out of the factory. You don’t want to know what happens if you get caught but it involves sleigh bells tied to certain parts of your anatomy.
A – So sum up Elf life at the North Pole in one sentence.
E – Fucking horrible – but come the revolution that will all change.
A – Thanks for speaking to me today
E – Spread the word Toots. The elves will rise up.

So this Christmas think of those less fortunate.

Tomorrow Mrs Claus - who is she exactly? Darling or Diva?

Kelly has the blog serial on Anny is all about Christmas on

I am clueless today…but the days are running out on our competition so I have to tell you what my true love give me sometime in the next two days…stayed tuned…same Amarinda channel…same Amarinda time..

Collect all twelve answers and e-mail them to with 12 days of Romance in the subject line to win some great books. There will be three lucky winners. The prizes –1st prize--6 books2nd prize--4 books3rd prize--2 booksAll books and prize winners will be drawn randomly

Anny Cook Winter Hearts
Sandra Cox Boji Stones
Bronwyn Green Ronan's Grail
Heather Hiestand Cards Never Lie
Barbara Huffert Deal of a Lifetime
Amarinda Jones Mad About Mirabelle
Kelly Kirch Time for Love
Cindy Spencer Pape Cowboy's Christmas Bride
Brynn Paulin Fallen
Jacquéline Roth Access Denied
KZ Snow Mrs. Claws
Lacey Thorn Earth Moves

All answers must be received no later than the stroke of midnight 21st December (Northern hemisphere time)
Go ahead: Live with abandon. Be outrageous at any age. What are you saving your best self for?


barbara huffert said...

I the elves! But I still want to talk about Rudolph.

Mona Risk said...

"You don’t want to know what happens if you get caught but it involves sleigh bells tied to certain parts of your anatomy."> Thanks for the laugh. Your best interview.

Anny Cook said...

Heh-heh. Only you would interview the elves! Thank you for the early morning laugh!

Brynn Paulin said...

Yeah e-readers!!! I don't have a traditional one (I use my palm pilot) but I love carrying a bunch of ebooks around with me. I read them while I wait in lines or for appointments, etc. Very handy and convenient. AND ebooks my late night cravings. Instant gratification is good. No more going to the bookstore...or wishing one was open at 2 AM.

Cindy Spencer Pape said...

Vive la revolution!

Dakota Rebel said...

Great interview AJ! And thank you for the handy holiday shopping list.

Kelly Kirch said...

Isn't that eReader sexy? Oh baby. I need me one of them. Come to mamma.

Fab interview of course. I haven't found a bad one yet, but this was funny.

Anny Cook said...

The house hunk gave me the Sony e-reader for Valentine's Day last year. I love it. Carry it everywhere with me loaded with hot stories.

Sandra Cox said...

You are too funny. I wouldn't have thought about interviewing elves but I like it.
Thanks for my book quote.

Sandra Cox said...

Is that your e reader. I like the looks of it.