Monday, 10 December 2007

The world according to Amarinda….

Who has the Christmas clue today? What am I talking about? Keep reading…

It was hot, hot, hot in Brisbane and I don‘t mean hot in the hero wants to shag me sensless way. It’s way too hot for that anyway. I would be telling the hero to back off unless he had chocolate ice-cream, an air conditioner, his own 140 litres of water (water restrictions in Bris) and a trowel. Why a trowel? I still haven’t fixed the cement at home I have been meaning to fix for a year or more. I wouldn’t mind seeing a bare-chested man getting all sweaty outside doing that. Though, to be honest, any male fixing the cement would be excellent to look at. Anyway, I digress…where was I? Oh yes, the heat. It is arse sweating off heat. Hmmm…if only I could sweat my arse off. But then maybe not. What would I sit on? None of my clothes would fit properly. What would I look in the mirror and cringe at? Hmmm…a conundrum. No arse versus how do I sit? What is my point? I’m getting to it. I was in Bris city today talking about jobs. I have come to the conclusion that I talk a lot of crap. Yes, I know, you are amazed. No, it’s true. I sit and listen to myself speaking and I think ‘damn you sound good’. I would employ me on sheer bullshit factor alone. I don’t exactly consider it lying. I think it’s more heightening your good points. I have had 27 jobs in my life. Yes. I am a tad restless. But because of this I know how to answer all the questions when it comes to jobs. No job question throws me. I look the interviewer dead in the eye and calmly shoot out whatever piece of embroidery (lie) I have to sound good. Yes, I expect I will go to hell one day but I know so many people there already it will be like a home coming.

I was discussing the whole job thing with author Sandra Cox I said to Sandra, I consider there are 6 easy steps to getting by with everything in life. Check below and see if you agree.

1. Be persistent – just because someone says no it does not mean you have to leave it at that. Annoy, persuade and wear them done until they are so sick of the sight and sound of you that they agree to anything so you’ll shut up and go away. Although this is a Jones family trait, it’s easy to learn.

2. Life is not a popularity contest. There are always going to be people who do not like you. That’s okay. Accept it and move on. Don’t let it stop you for getting what you want.

3. Be confident. Speak like you know you are fabulous. I sometimes hear myself saying stuff and I think – ‘god, you’re full of it’ but 9 times out of 10 I get want I set out to get.

4. Look people in the eye. It’s a way of letting them know you are interested in them and no, you’re not intimidated even though they may be in a position to make or break you.

5. Be honest and speak your mind in a calm, rational manner. It disarms people and they are more inclined to listen to you through shock than politeness. Trust me, I’m an expert on this

6. Have a sense of humour. Accept things will stuff up and move on. You cannot sweat the small stuff.

So what do you do to get what you want?

Check out those old comics I scanned. My mother cut these out for me years ago and they sum up the philosophy I try to live by. Maybe if you squint and tilt your head sideways – no, the other way – you’ll be able to make them out.

I bought a 2008 Firefighters calendar today. I had no option. Two half naked firefighters approached me in the city and asked me to buy one. I was hormonally helpless to knock them back. What is a girl to do in this situation? All the flesh on display…it’s would be wrong to have said no. Of course the calendars are used to raise money for charity. I am sure that’s why every woman dutifully buys one. It’s the nurturing, sensitive side of us that makes us fork out the dosh and nothing to do with content. No, really…anyway, I am not a great believer in judging by outside appearance. Sure these men are gorgeous but they have trained bloody hard to get bodies like that. They work hard for a living and are very good at what they do. Where would we be without our emergency service people? And yes, I will put the calendar up next year and I will smile at the bods on display. I am woman after all. I did however piss off one biddy on the way home on the bus – I don’t drive in the heart of Brisbane city. I’m crazy but not insane. Anyway I sat down and dumped the calendar and assorted crap I had collected on the seat beside me. An old duck looked over and told me she was ‘horrified’ that I had such ‘filth on display.’ I said “Don’t look then.” Jeeze Louise get a grip. Had she never see a bulging bicep before? Interestingly she kept looking back over at it on the way home. Terrible to be so horrified….

12 Days of Romance

Do you want to win some fantastic holiday reading? If so come celebrate the Twelve days of Romance with 12 authors from Ellora's Cave, Wild Rose Press, Total-E-Bound and Cerridwen Press. Each day beginning December 8th and running through December 19th one of the twelve authors will tell what their "True love gave to them" on either their blog or website.

Collect all twelve answers and e-mail them to with 12 days of Romance in the subject line to win some great books. There will be three lucky winners. The prizes –1st prize--6 books, 2nd prize--4 books, 3rd prize--2 books. All books and prize winners will be drawn randomly

Anny Cook Winter Hearts

Sandra Cox Boji Stones

Bronwyn Green Ronan's Grail

Heather Hiestand Cards Never Lie

Barbara Huffert Deal of a Lifetime

Amarinda Jones Mad About Mirabelle

Kelly Kirch Time for Love

Cindy Spencer Pape Cowboy's Christmas Bride

Brynn Paulin Fallen

Jacquéline Roth Access Denied

KZ Snow Mrs. Claws

Lacey Thorn Earth Moves

All answers must be received no later than the stroke of midnight 21st December (Northern hemisphere time)

Anny has author Anita Birt on As for Kelly, that’s the great imponderable as to what she will had on I thing we all need more imponderables - and chocolates in our lives….just a thought.
Go ahead: Live with abandon. Be outrageous at any age. What are you saving your best self for?


Anny Cook said...

Sigh. Greaaat bods. Yes I can see how you would need to do your part by buying a calendar. Really.

Mona Risk said...

Amarinda, I agree with your points about how to get hired. Only five years ago I was still working as a Director of Analytical Testing and interviewing at least five applicants a week. Some people I hired because they had good experience and some because I thought they had the right disposition and character to learn. One I hired because he looked so helpless and told me at the end of the interview: "I guess you don't want to see me again like all the others." I hired him. He worked for our company 10 years and did a great job.

Kelly Kirch said...

I once went to an interview and told them how I had worried over the old man who'd cashed in his life policy (I did worry and sent him money that year), I was very dramatic even to clutching my chest and tearing up "I still think about him to this day," I said. Both interviewers wept and I had a job. I didn't fabricate but I certainly played it up.

Are these Aussie Firefighters? Can I purchase online? I think it is very important to support the men keeping us, er, you, safe.

Brynn Paulin said...

I first read that you were approached by two and a half naked firemen and I thought, "naked firemen? I'd buy one too." Then I was a little worried about that half fireman,and what had happened to him...

BTW, filth on display? I would have pointed out there isn't a speck of dirt on that hot hot man.

Molly Daniels said...

I love the 'Life is not a popularity contest' point! Must remember to tell this to my kids...

Anny Cook said...

I was hired at my last job after interviewing in muddy sweatpants and a torn t-shirt.

At the time I was in school, learning a word processing program. The pipes under our mobile home broke so I spent the morning helping the house hunk repair them, ending with barely enough time to get to my afternoon class. If you didn't go to class you didn't receive your unemployment money for that day.

When I arrived at school my instructor told me about a job offer downstairs in the Adult Ed department. I trotted down, asked for an application, went back upstairs to fill it out, and then went back downstairs to turn it in. At that time, I asked them if I could arrange an appointment for an interview.

The gal that took my application went into the Director's office, and then returned a moment later. "She'll see you now."

"But I'm not dressed for an interview!" I protested.

"She knows." You KNOW what she must have told the Director!

Anyway, I figured that I wasnt' going to get the job so I was very relaxed as I had decided to use the interview as a dry run.

Later when we talked about it, the Director told me she hired me as she figured if I could get through an interview under those circumstances I could probably handle anything else that came along. Heh.

LynTaylor said...

Mmmm ... firefighters *she says in her best Homer voice* ;) Ooh I wish some half nekid firemen would corner me on the street. Dayum! *sigh* You know I've been eyeing off the Rugby League calender in the newsagency window lately. Might have to take another cruise past ;). Mmm mmm! All those nekid bod's ;)

Gee, as for interviews. Hate 'em with a passion. I haven't been to that many. I temped for many years so it wasn't really necessary. I'm really not good at selling myself LOL!

Sandra Cox said...

I read your blogs shake my head and laugh. You are too funny. You would do an excellent job writing a daily column for the newspapers.
Thanks for the pub!

Shelley Munro said...

I read your post - I really did, but then I arrived at the fireman part and that was it. Hormonal puddle indeed ;-)

Jacquéline_Roth said...

Very pretty calendar. I always get calendars for Christmas but I never get one's like that. I get palm trees and impressionists. It's just not the same.